BE Attitudes:The Relationship Manual
There’s no question that most relationships require effort on the part of both parties in order to work well. When problems arise, whether overt and loud or just tension simmering below the surface, it takes both partners actively trying to put things to right again. Extreme dysfunction, no doubt, requires the assistance of a professional counselor, but many couples now have a new option in the form of Barabara Jean Lonsdorf’s book BE Attitudes: The Relationship Manual.
In all honesty, this is a book that the vast majority of couples would likely find useful on some level; there is no such thing as a perfect relationship, and nearly everyone could benefit from implementing some of the very sound, very rational ideas that Lonsdorf presents in this workbook. She starts off by discussing one of the very foundations of a relationship: intimacy. She defines intimacy of all kinds, including both physical and emotional, and addresses how communication problems and unresolved conflicts can interfere with maintaining a strong intimate bond between a couple. Then Lonsdorf delves into the heart of her book: the BE Attitudes, which might be thought of as a set of rules to live by.
Each BE Attitude has its own chapter defining it and explaining how it can be used to improve a relationship. From being compassionate to being mindful, with a whole range of other positive “attitudes” in between, Lonsdorf delves into a plethora of strategies for making a relationship work. And scattered throughout the book, included in every chapter, are exercises to help readers directly use this information. In fact, BE Attitudes is really meant as a workbook of sorts; the author recommends that both partners have their own copy so they can take notes and complete the exercises as they read through it together.
Truly, this book has the potential to be an invaluable resource for any couple, not just one facing relationship problems. If you’re trying to make it last for the long haul, consider picking it up.
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